Monday, February 17, 2014

OCD Woes...

So today, I got new carpet installed; which was terrific. Terrific until the installer tried to vacuum afterwards. I say tried because what followed could be called many things, but vacuuming probably wouldn't be one of them. You could have called it combing the carpet. Maybe slightly sucking up the carpet, but to actually refer to it as vacuuming would be a lie and go against all that is holy about the whole process of sucking up bits of trash and dirt with a machine. And yes, this post will be about vacuuming because I have OCD and I detest anyone cleaning in any form in my house. Because I feel like I have to do it myself. Because I feel there is a certain process and to not do it in that order makes it seem as if it is not clean. Because the saying, "it doesn't matter how you get it done as long as it gets done," may be an actual truth with the complete exception of trying to clean an OCD sufferers home. In which case it does matter how you do it, and it is not truly clean to them if you stray from that process....

It is apparently in the contract to vacuum up all the tiny tidbits after installation. I tried to tell him I was more than happy to do it myself. My husband even tried to explain it to him, but to no avail. He had to do it and what followed was an anxiety level like I haven't dealt with in awhile.

I was excited when he came from the truck toting my exact vacuum model. This may not be so bad, I thought. I mean, I have had other people help me clean before and although I had hated every stinking second of it, I made it through and really how bad could it be?

Firstly, he missed whole sections and the beautiful marks the vacuum made where all out of line and every which way. He ran it over the carpet not with a passion like I do but more like someone who finds vacuuming tedious, And I don't blame him for that. Most people hate to vacuum. I on the other hand, was extremely excited to get vacuum it for the first time. I looked forward to the possibility of it, like a child looks forward to getting an ice cream cone on Sunday. I was so stoked. Yes, I am aware that makes me weird and no I don't care how that makes me sound.

If the anxiety of the way he vacuumed wasn't bad enough, I realized that the vacuum dustbin was overfilled. It was making the high pitched whine that a too full vacuum makes as it struggles to suck dirt in and has no where to store it. Just watching it no longer able to spin the dirt around in the tunnel was enough to drive my nerves into a frenzy. I had visions of myself walking up to him, unplugging the thing, ripping out the dustbin and emptying it and putting back together, and plugging it back in without saying a word. I wanted to. I really did, but who does that, seriously? So instead, I refused to look at it. I refused to watch the vacuum massacre going on in my living room and instead bit my lip until I tasted blood. It would all be over soon, I told myself. Then I could whip out my vacuum and do it properly after he left. My husband just watched me and patted my hand. He knows how much other people cleaning in my house bothers me.

And so this is the problem. I don't want other people to "tidy up" in my home. I am totally uncomfortable with it. I wanted him to just leave it and let me do it. However, some people
have complained before if they leave bits of carpet fibers around after they install the carpet. Seriously, why? Why complain about something so minor as that?

The installers were highly professional and did amazing work in a really short time. My husband even called the store to compliment the installers for the excellent work they did. I hope they get rewarded or something, because they really deserve it. My issue is that because of my mental illness, getting people to do not do things that make me very uncomfortable can be impossible. My husband even told them that I had OCD and preferred them not to vacuum. They didn't understand or they weren't allowed to not vacuum and that kinda bothers me. I know the world doesn't revolve around me and my illness but on the other hand, I really wish people understood more about OCD and how debilitating it can be. Even with something as small as a carpet installer vacuuming after he installs it.....

The carpet looks marvelous and I am really happy with it. My whole family is. I even was thrilled with the installers. I am just not thrilled with my OCD but there isn't much I can do about that, I guess. I did vacuum it properly as soon as they were out the door. My cats love the carpet too.


Mr.H loves laying on the new carpet. Yes, I know he is fat. We got him that way. Lol.

8 comments:

  1. Great story. I like the humorous spin on it. More importantly though I think you gave some insight into my wife. She will not let me help her clean to the point of cleaning cages for MY 10 birds. After reading your entry I believe she has some OCD in her also. Of course it works out great as my bipolar often makes it hard for me to do it. Thanks.

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  2. I think I'd be screaming with my ears covered in another room! So good that you made it through that hell!

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    1. Oh, I was tempted let me tell you....LOL. I was pretty sure that would send them running from the house in a panic and I needed that carpet. I am sooo glad its over though. Thanks you Frankie :)

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  3. Yay for new carpet! I understand having to have a process go a certain way... it just doesn't feel right if you don't. Oh, the joys of OCD! I'm glad you made it through.

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  4. Thank you Paul. She may well have OCD. Then again some people are just very orderly in a pattern. OCD patterns can be a cleaning pattern but it is really just to get rid of intrusive thoughts and feelings. So she may just be a cleaner type personality and there is nothing wrong with that. It's good that it helps fit in with your Bipolar.

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    1. Thank you Savanna! Who knew carpet is so wonderful? Like walking on beige puffy clouds. I love it!!!! OCD is such a pain in the hind end though. I totally agree with you there.

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  5. Years ago I paid a visit to my sister in London and it was a lovely summer’s day so we were out the back and she had cut the grass the day before so we were all sun bathing in her back garden. After a while I wanted to collect something from inside the house but before she let me in she insisted on hovering my whole body (I was only wearing football shorts) as she was afraid of me bringing grass into her house from the garden. That is the first and last time any woman has ever hovered me and I’m not eager to have it done again. So enjoy your carpet and good luck to you for enjoying hovering as for me well I would rather put my feet up and chill. Thanks

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  6. Michael although I like a clean house there is nothing I enjoy about having OCD. I think you actually bring up a valid point. Mainly because how we are portrayed people seem to think that we enjoy the cleaning or rituals. That we do these things because we like them. In reality they make us feel bad and guilty. We hate the control OCD has placed over our lives. Thank you for your support though.

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