Pandora's box

Two days ago I was watching my local news. It said that to kill most of the germs on your hands you need to use soap and water. You have to wash them long enough to sing happy birthday twice. As a person with OCD I really did not need to know this. Now that the news has inadvertently given me a new compulsion I am going to make it fun. When I sing happy birthday twice I am going to do in the style of Marilyn Monroe.....

Everyone with mental illness has had that moment. The moment when we have had to reach out for help. It's terrifying. The fear is so palpable we can taste the coppery flavor of It. Not just a stigma but a stigmata of our pain bleeding onto the floor. We have been shamed and therefore are ashamed. We don't want to face the dark recesses in our mind. We are so afraid that what lurks beneath the darkness is something so twisted, so dark and unholy that it should never be directly looked at. Going through our mind is like opening Pandora's box and nothing good could come from it. We are convinced that lies we have heard all of our lives are true. We are fearful that we are unacceptable, unlovable, failures. We long to be held, loved, accepted, and healed. We have no idea how to reach what comes so naturally to others. We are so afraid of what others will say. Afraid to be locked in cage and sneered at like the elephant man. Terrified that we could be the next sideshow carnival attraction. Shoved in a booth somewhere in between the bearded lady and the sword swallower. Free popcorn would be passed out as long as the kids don't poke the world's "craziest" person too much with a stick to see what he would do. So we keep silent. For us silence isn't golden. It is a locked rusty gate that prevents us from living the life we want. It blocks out not just the bad things but the also the good. It cages us more than anything others could do to us. It keeps us broken. Silence kills us. We are the wilted flower starving for water. Our lips are chapped and cracked from the thirst. Our throats are dry from the lack of speaking. Speak. Say it out loud for the whole world. Open Pandora's box. There are others who are just like us. We are not alone. They suffer from the same pain. They can accept us. We have to share. Release this sickness of fear and silence. We are here to hold your hand. We can be healed. We have nothing to be ashamed of. We can break down that locked gate of silence by reaching out to each other. When this world chews us up and spits us out we can be there to catch one another. This can be our salvation. Speak.